How Not to Turn a Time-Out Into an ER Visit (Parenting for the Diagnosis)

One day, Ismail (age 8) was in time-out — again. At that age, he was spending more time in time-out than out of it. I noticed a dime on the floor but, exhausted, thought, What harm could a dime do? 

Seconds later, his little brother Kaleo sprinted in:

“Mommy! Iz put a dime in his nose and it won’t come out!”

Ismail confirmed it. I checked — nose, mouth, angles worthy of a dental exam — nothing. We moved to better lighting. Still nothing. I started wondering if they were pranking me.

“No, Mom, I swear,” Iz insisted.

Unsure what to do (nursing school did not cover “nasal coin retrieval”), I called my mom, a seasoned nurse. She said to call the pediatrician, who promptly sent us to the ER.

At the ER, the doctor looked and… also found nothing. We were sent home with an ENT referral and instructions to “wait and watch,” which is never something a parent wants to hear.

Walking through the parking garage, Ismail sneezed — once, twice — and ching! 
 

The dime shot out and skittered across the concrete. We froze. Then Kaleo erupted in laughter, and so did we.

That day confirmed what I had been avoiding: time-outs weren’t working, not because he was “being bad,” but because he was showing early signs of hypomania. He and I were escalating each other — his behaviors growing more extreme, my reactions louder and more desperate.

This wasn’t disobedience. It was a medical condition.

And no amount of time-outs, sticker charts, or parenting tricks could touch it — only shame him more and make everything worse.

What he needed wasn’t “better discipline.”

He needed medical care: proper evaluation, medication, therapy, and support.

If your attempts to parent are not working — where you feel like they work for other parents/ kids — It’s time to take a closer look at what might be the underlying problem and seek help.